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A Little Help From My Friends

5/26/2016

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To bring broader perspectives and insights from other moms, you'll see some guest posts over the next few months. I am thrilled that my friend and co-coach, Dina Smith, has agreed to share some of her thoughts. Please tuck these reminders into your heart and be reminded of this applicable and useful advice.

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​My Advice To Moms
By Dina R. Smith

As a Therapist, Organizer and Coach I wear many hats. My most prized hat is that of Mom. This hat is the most rewarding and the most difficult of them all. Yes, I get frustrated. Yes I cry. I call my mom. I call my coach and sometimes I call them both! So, when asked what advice words of advice I would give to working moms, inside and outside of the home, Here is what I would say:

1. You are not Alone!
Know that you are the hands and feet of God. Stand in the fullness of that role. Sometimes that means making hard decisions. But you know what? You are perfectly qualified for the position. Rest assured there is on-the-job training for most careers, this one is no different. Now, you may have to research and sign up for some additional training but the pay-offs are well worth it! Call a friend, mom-coach, therapist your mom or join a group. Someone knows what your are going through. You are not alone!

2. Happiness Is an Inside Job!
Just like the laundry, no one is going to take care of this for you. You are responsible for creating the happiness you deserve. Nothing teaches your kids to be happy more than them seeing you create your own happiness. Remember they watch much more than they listen.

3. 
Make Self-Care your Priority!
Make Self-Care a Lifestyle not a vacation. Don’t wait for life to slow down to take a break. Life rarely slows down. Make a list of ways to take care of yourself. Start with self-care moments until the habit of taking care of yourself is second nature. You will become more relaxed, nurturing and promote wellness throughout the entire household.     

4. 
Let Go of the Guilt!
Every parent makes mistakes. Parenting is one of the most difficult jobs on the planet. I will be the first to admit that I did not get a handbook in the delivery room. If I did I was probably too busy to read it. Know that you are doing the best you can and are always improving. Stay connected to your support system. They will see you through the tough times.

I hope this post reaches you in the best of places. May your homes be filled with joy and love.

Dina R. Smith, Life Coach, Professional Organizer
Facebook: Organized Life Works

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Spinning Our Plates Vs. Spinning Our Wheels

5/10/2016

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Spinning Plates
There was a TV show in the “olden golden” days called the Lawrence Welk Show. It was a variety show that featured entertainers of the day. One of the performers I remember was a plate spinner, similar to THIS VIDEO.

As my life unfolded to include many children and numerous businesses, each with commitment and responsibility, I recognized that I run around on stage much like the performer keeping plates spinning for an audience. Mind you, I’m also in the audience. Regularly, I am entertaining myself. I can laugh heartily at my efforts.

It takes a lot of energy to keep plates spinning, doesn’t it? When a plate drops, sometimes there is a dangerous mess to clean up. More often, it’s simply a broken plate that needs to be cleaned up and decision about whether or not there is a margin of energy to keep it in the “performance”.

To follow the plate imagery, let’s explore how to increase the effectiveness in balancing what is in our lives:

Energy: Where do you get it? How do you sustain it?
For me, there are areas of my well – being that I know are crucial for my effectiveness and steady contributions to all I choose. My lifestyle (diet, exercise, chiropractic, prayer, reflection, sleep, etc) and relationships (with my God, partner, kids, family / friends, fellowship / friendship with "my people" and even, maybe especially, mySelf) fuel me. Know where your energy comes from.

Momentum: What are the habits and systems you have in place to reflect and evaluate how you spend your available energy? I’ve used various tools over the years, but currently use a personalized Daily Rhythm Register from Darren Hardy’s work and the applications of brain dumping from David Allen’s Getting Things Done.

Attention and Intention: Line it up – are you giving attention to what you INTEND to give attention to? Distractions are everywhere. As a mother of 5, I have learned to make “room for detours” so that I can CHOOSE to give my attention to the day’s priority. There is energy in choice.  Recently, I added the Passion Planner that organizes my intentions in a methodical process, speaking a similar language that I use with clients. There are ample tools out there. Find the ones that resonate with you and USE THEM, not because anyone said to, but because you choose to, knowing they support your intentions.

Seasons: There are seasons with more plates than others. With more plates, there is more running between them, increased stresses and increased production. There are seasons with less plates too. Pick. Choose. Receive the Power of choice in the plates you DESIRE to give your energy to.  

Do the plates ever drop? Of course they do. How do you think we learn to spin them and then spin more? If you wanted to learn how to spin plates, you start with one. Gradually, you add more and perfect your skill of spinning over time. In another plate spinning video with Henrick Bothe on the Ed Sulllivan Show, he says “HELP!” That is a powerful and valuable word to keep in our vocabulary as we learn to navigate the new plates that we’re adding. Leading in our businesses create this need, yes? We can bring others in to spin some plates. Remember that different seasons have different plates. New kids, like new businesses require different attentions and intentions, don’t they? How many of us still spin the diapering and potty training plate? How many of us enroll others to share some of the spinning. You're not alone. Ever.

We have all dropped a few plates in our lives. Can you receive that experience in a way that is life giving and contributes to more energy & attention to your intentions? OR are you framing the experience as failing? This is a very energy draining perspective.

Rest: It’s okay to stack the plates, take a break and come back tomorrow. They’ll be there and you prioritize which ones get your energy for the day. You remember that the oxygen mask goes on the parent before the child on an airplane? Your recovery and time for health is critical to the energy you can bring to those commitments tomorrow.

Learn to leverage your experiences with patience, trust in the processes that you’re investing in, and stay aware of the skills you’re developing along the way.You’re not spinning your wheels, you’re spinning plates.

At the end of the performances, the crowd roars. Please find your voice, and ROAR with them.  You’re in the audience too, Mom. Give yourself a hand.

I'd love to hear your thoughts and feedback. If you enjoyed these perspectives and reminders, please share with others so they can be encouraged too.

wise, wisdom, responsibility, future
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Maybe Simply Allow May To Be May

5/6/2016

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Be Now
There is not another parent in the carpool or grocery line that wouldn't agree with you that there is "so much going on". The end of year parties and celebrations, the honor  and awards days, field days, career days, end of soccer trophies gatherings, performances and ceremonies are all good and all have value in their own moments. 

Often, piled on top of each other, they burden, loosing value and become cost. Not just cost to the mom who is orchestrating getting everyone to their events, capturing evidence of her having attended herself, but it ripples, doesn't it?

Just do the moment you're in, momma. Engage there. The next day or even just the next hour will come soon enough. You don't need to carry it now. 

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Stepping on Violets?

5/5/2016

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Not just during Mother's Month, but everyday.  
​For ourselves and others, may we smell the violets today.
forgiveness
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Mother's Month is finally here!!

5/1/2016

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It's finally here! Bring on Mother's Month! Years ago my oldest daughter expanded Mother's Day to last a WHOLE MONTH! It's an incredible experience and part of what keeps my mommy tank so full. To pass along the love to you and the moms "in your world", I'll be hosting a live, free call EVERY WEEK during Mother's Month. 
No sales or gimmicks...just love, inspiration, support, and some tools to facilitate mommies who desire to be healthier and more peaceful versions of themselves.

Several of my private clients have recently leveraged the value of their own mothers smile and happiness as a gift when they were young girls. Remembering how they felt when their moms were stressed impacted how committed they were to working toward becoming healthier women now.

Do you know any stressed moms? Do you think it effects the kids?

Please share the link below with moms you know who could use:
- a dose of love
- a few useful tools
- healthier perspective

Registration is simple, just click on the button below and choose one of the following call dates / times.​
​

Wednesday, May 4th - 8:30 PM EST
Thursday, May 12th - 8:30 AM EST
Tuesday, May 17th, 8:30 AM EST
Wednesday, May 25th, 8:30 PM EST

There are 2 morning and 2 evening calls to choose from. The calls will be live, lasting about 45 minutes with opportunity afterwards for Q & A. I hope you'll join me. Please share this email or copy and paste the following link into your Facebook groups, news-feed, etc.
  http://www.optimomcoaching.com/optimom-group-phone-session.html  

Together, we really are creating a healthier place to raise our kids. Thank you for being a part of that process!

Happy Mother's MONTH!

Be well.
Lisa
OptiMOM Coaching

PS - Please remember that the Pay It Forward bank is funded by people who are investing in the health and well being of moms who can't afford the support right now. Please consider contributing to the "bank" by clinking HERE.

Register Now
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    Contribute to the Pay It Forward Program;  sessions are often given to moms who need the support but can't afford it right now.

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    Lisa Engle

    Widely known for her passion, dedication and commitment to supporting the expression of potential, Lisa is famous for inspiring patients toward health, especially mothers. With more than 3 decades of service in chiropractic, she easily communicates the value of wisdom within. Her experience has been used to create a safe, effective, and reflective coaching model for mothers without the judgement, comparison, and crippling overwhelm that often inhibits change  for families.
    ​To learn more about Lisa's work and contact her, please poke around the website.

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